5.07.2010

Slack Hard. Play Harder.


Slacklining With A View...

For CLEANSNIPE.COM

Formatted properly and the movies actually work HERE... don't bother reading it here... too busy to reformat it for this blog.

Regardless of your sport, age, or ability level, you could benefit from learning to walk a slackline.  There's nothing better for improving your balance, coordination and concentration. Also, slacklining strengthens your core muscles and all the little doodads in your hips, knees, ankles and feet that are so crucial to skiing, snowboarding, surfing, skating, rock climbing, mountain biking, dancing drunk, sticking it to the Man, running from the Law, etc.  In addition, walking the slack improves your overall reaction time and teaches you to fall gracefully, making you less prone to injury and more likely to land well regardless of how you find yourself airborne.


Clearly Impressed.  Get Some.

Not only is slacklining good for you, but it's fun as well.  All you need are a few cheap 'biners, some tubular webbing, and a few trees for a ridiculously good time.  Set up your line in a park and odds are you'll impress (or amuse) some ladies (or gents).  Get good enough and people might start throwing change in your hat.  Get really good and before you know it you'll be a tight-roping, back-flipping carnival freak  sharing a trailer with the Bearded Lady and wiping your ass with W2 Forms.  Mother Earth would approve.
Slacklining is also a great way to clear your mind.  The focus necessary to merely stand atop one forces thoughts out of your head.  If you're feeling Eastern, you can meditate on the slack.  Some folks even go so far as to do Yoga on a slackline.  Whatever floats yer boat and gets ya laid...
I learned to slackline over the course of a few months in Patagonian Argentina.  In the now-banned Campamento Madsen my now-dead Argentine Friend El Chino (R.I.P.) had three lines set up in the wind-tortured trees: a low shorty for beginners, a 40 foot line for tricks, and a 65 foot highline for expert recreation and testicular mutilation.  The weather was perpetually shitty and the mountains (when the clouds rarely parted) too terrifying to actually climb.  As such, $2 bottles of wine, ditch weed spliffs, chicken fried steaks, and walking the slack filled our days.  Life could be worse...

Learning to stay on the thing took a few days and a few hundred falls.  Here are a few tips to get you started:
  • Make sure you've got flat ground with minimal pokey things in the area.  Clean up any sticks, dogshit, loose rocks, etc. that you could potentially fall on.
  • The tighter the line the quicker it will wobble.  The looser the line the bigger those wobbles will be.  If you paid atttention in high school physics, you can relate this to WAVELENGTH and PERIOD... but don't ask me how.  Just start off with a tight line and tiny wobbles.
  • By holding onto someone's shoulder or a tree branch, it's easy to walk slack.  Learning with a spotter to fall onto is highly recommended
  • Don't look down.  If you look at your feet or the line you will fall.  Focus your eyes and attention on a point at about eye level.  Find a special little piece of tree to stare at and it'll do wonders for your learning curve.
  • Don't think  Just do.  If you're thinking about anything unrelated, worried about falling, or trying to impress people you're more likely to eat shit.  Clear your mind, smile, and let your body do the thinking.
  • Fall wisely.  Try to stay on your feet when you fall but if you're going ass-over-teakettle do not try to catch yourself as you risk breaking a wrist.  It's far better to catch the line or protect the family jewels with your hands.  Think like a professional stuntman and "roll with it".
Once you've mastered walking a short line (15-25 feet), you can work your way to longer and longer lines.  Eventually you'll find a line length you prefer and will catch yourself eye-fucking perfectly spaced trees.  No trees?  No problem: set up a line off between two trucks, boulders, buildings, NASCAR fans, or any other heavy, immovable objects.


Cheapo Idiot-Proof 25m Slackline Kit: $99



Super Baller Mammut Slackline Kit: $170.

Setting up a line is easy, especially if you have aslackline kit.  Numerous manufacturers offer kits priced between $75 and $170.  I recommend getting a 20+ meter kit so you're not limited to short setups.  Longer lines are more intimidating at first but ultimately more fun.  Plus, the  higher the heights the funnier the falls.
If you're strapped for cash or more of a do-it yourselfer, make your own slackline from scratch for under $50.  All you need is the following:
Watch the following video and practice the knots recommended in it.  Other knots work but since the slackline is under high tension and your stomping around on it puts it under high loads, most other knots become almost impossible to undo.  Once you've set up your line a few times, it will become automatic and easy.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=18qbgwCn2ZA[/youtube]
And, of course, here's some slackline porn.  First, some Euros with gorgeous mountains but questionable taste in music:
[vimeo]http://www.vimeo.com/7530344[/vimeo]
A bunch of little kids going crazy....
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZPpDN0coscA[/youtube]
Bonafied Badass Dean Potter Highlining Lost Arrow Spire in Yoesmite National Park...
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90xfWYnz9KM[/youtube]
And of course, a beginner getting NUTTED...
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q9gaCC3l7fU&feature=related[/youtube]
Like I said, grab the line or guard the family jewels.  Above all else, have fun!
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