Scratch That...

Ummm, yeah... on second thought...

Northern Peru ain't too far and I'm a persuasive son of a gun.

Can I interest you in a ketchup popsicle, sweety?

Signing Off...

Hey All,

Exactly a year ago today I set sail out of Hood River, Oregon aboard the Sin Fin. If you want a summary of the trip, read this blog from back to front.

For the last few weeks "the trip without end" has seemed over. I'm pounding down the lid on this box of bones.

Patagonian fjordland was the plan but it'll have to wait. If I want to leave, El Nino could make at least Chile attainable in a couple months.

At this point, continuing onward would be the cowardly thing to do. And, I should probably make some money.

Opportunity knocks and I'm powerless but not to answer.

If the previous sentence comes off senseless, it's because I'm in love.

New dreams abrew.

I've fallen in with Dale Dagger and his crew. I'm tending a bar. I'm chartering ol' Sinful. I'm starting a surf camp that ski bums can afford.

If anyone wants an all inclusive Nicaraguan surf vacation hit me up... no crowds... no tourists... friendly locals... offshore winds everyday.... world class waves... cheap everything... great times.

I'll post some pics of the "surf camp" in a day or two. Flights would be into Managua.

Here's one for the fridge, Mom.

I love y'all. Thanks for all your support.

Just getting started...



Growin' Roots

Hey All,

No time to do justice.

I'm back in Gigante tending bar, chartering the boat, taking out the trash, getting fit, getting paid, and...

All my gear is off the boat for the first time since leaving Hood River... kites, skis, climbing shit, etc. A whole room at the hostel is devoted to my crap. The boat sails better light and I'm not going anywhere.

The plan is to make a go of it here.





Hey All,

If you don't like my blog, don't read it. Writing is hard enough without negative criticism.

Hell, holding an actual opinion is hard enough when nearly everything and everyone bombards you with bullshit.

Fall fashions.

Some folks think I'm cynical and pessimistic but they couldn't be farher from the truth. I'm hoping to enjoy today. I'm hoping to enjoy tomorrow. I'm hoping to meet the right woman and raise a family as far removed from nonsense as is possible. I'm hoping to survive WWIII.

If WWIII never escalates to open war, GREAT!... but my gut tells me otherwise. Uhhh, look around, the open war's been on for years... and we're the aggressors.

I've had a half dozen people drop the same stupid phrase on me in the last two weeks:


DOOMSDAY PROPHET? I'm not a DOOMSDAY PROPHET. I just have Jesustastic hair because 1) it attracts the right kind of woman and 2) it prevents the majority of squares from spewing bullshit at me. It's FUNctional. It's armor.

See, the world doesn't need DOOMSDAY PROPHETS anymore because we have a little something called SCIENCE... and HISTORY... and ECONOMICS... and PSYCHOLOGY... and LOGIC... and COMPUTER MODELING... and BLAH BLAH BLAH.

And if you put them all together like a smart little bugger it becomes pretty apparent that the great human free for all has spun out of control.

So instead of DOUBTING or DENYING I'm DEALING... and encouraging you to do the same.

I'm not saying anything the best and brightest didn't figure out centuries ago. I'm not controversial. The great consumeristic technoreligion y'all have boughten into IS rather controversial, and frankly, I don't follow your reasoning.

Think with me here... it's TOMORROW... blue skies, singing birds... where would you rather be?

1) working a job you dislike
2) maintaining appearances
2.5) acquiring crap you don't need
3) jerking off with a computer
3.5) trying to figure out a new gadget
4) exercising in hope of passing out later
5) boozing in hopes of passing out later
6) medicating your "mental illness"
7) repenting for forgiveness
8) arguing about stupid shit
9) looking for that special someone
10) exploring the unknown
11) following a dream
12) making something out of nothing
13) acquiring practical knowledge

IF you answered 9, 10, 11, 12, or 13 CONGRATULATIONS!

So, and here's the real question: why don't you actually do it?

The first day of medical school during introductions, every one of my classmates mentioned their love of the OUTDOORS.

Bullshit! Delusion! Tralse!

A week later I was skipping lectures to rockclimb the North Shore of Superior. A week after that I was back in the Tetons smiling for my Wyoming Driver's License. Now I haven't driven a car in a year... and I know I'm better for it.

Now a trickier scenario. It's TOMORROW... rationed food, rampant violence... where would you rather be?

1) dropping economic, political, or actual bombs
2) jerking off in front of a computer
3) arguing about stupid shit
4) looting the MALL*WART
5) medicating your "mental illness"
6) laughing at the losers
6.5) protecting your family from seriously fucked up people
7) eating your neighbor's food (or your neighbor)
8) standing in a breadline
9) getting terrorized
10) repenting for forgiveness
11) playing Robin Hood
12) spearfishing a crystal clear lagoon full of fish, gathering coconuts off the beach, mangoes out of the forest... maybe a sunset surf and some meditation.
13) meditating on a mountaintop until our soul blows off in the wind

If you answered 6.5, 11, 12, or 13, CONGRATS! You're human.

Brain's gotta go...

In actual news...

The dog vanished for three days off a deserted beach south of San Juan Del Sur. After 8 hours of searching over two days I was pretty convinced a croc or boa constrictor ate her. Then she just showed up.

Her little stunt proved beneficial because instead of sailing the Aussie boys to Gigante, I had to stick around town where I made some good connections.

The first is a commercial boat captain and surfer from Florida looking for someone to run his pimpin' sailboat in the BVI for the winter surf season. After the winter he wants help sailing it through the canal to Polynesia. I'm probably in... but the second prospect is tempting as well.

There's a 38 foot sailboat in decent shape that someone is practically giving away and a Canadian who made the mistake of having three kids with a Nicaraguan lady (and hence adopting and supporting a whole grip of her relatives) has got the means to get me chartering it legally out of San Juan until I pay it off and it's MINE.

6 berths.
Built for rough seas.
New sails.
Blah, blah, blah...
Basically, it's the Sin Fin on Turleyesque supplements.

With a boat like that I'd need a treasure chest for the loot from surf charters and after a few months of dialing it out and hoarding I'd beeline it to Polynesia myself... May at the latest.

And once you're in Polynesia it's a few weeks back to the fjords of Chile.

The other option would be looking for actual sponsorship... but who the hell wants to sponsor a sail/surf/kite/ski/mountaineering expedition designed to raise awareness of human futility?

Just me. Bye.