5.11.2009

In Digestion...

I've let a lot of thoughts slip unrecorded for propriety's sake. Not "properties", dipshit, "propriety's".

pro·pri·e·ty
n. pl. pro·pri·e·ties
1. The quality of being proper; appropriateness.
2. Conformity to prevailing customs and usages.
3. proprieties The usages and customs of polite society.

I don't care what the rest of y'all think about me, but I hate to worry my parents... the last thing I want to appear to them is crazy.

Every once in a blue moon, however, shit makes sense and if you don't record the clarity... snatch it up and wrestle it out...you'll hate yourself plastered... so here goes.

The real purpose of this trip, beyond all the games and good times, is a search for the best place to exist (and, ideally, raise something up) while civilization consumes itself.

ADVANCE RECON...
into an unknown future.

Geographically, I've yet to find dickall... but I expected that... and I'm only about halfway THERE.

Mentally, it's been, well, educational.

The hard part is appetite control...
sexual...
experiential...
adrenal...
physical...
financial.

A greasy feast at the Wort.
Snuggling up to the moment's ONE.
Slaying POW.
You know... the old LIST of GOOD THINGS.

The only way I can stop fearing the collapse of society is through assurance that I can exist removed from it... in spite of it, if need be.

Hence the sailing... studies of weather and sea... a thousand assorted fiddlings... the post-collegiate mountain monkeying... the acquisition of skills and attempted development of TOUGHNESS.

The hard part is developing hopefulness in a life harder and less fruitful than you grew into... working on you PMA.

Positive Mental Attitude.

The hard part is knowing who to surround yourself with... if anybody... especially when your trust is all shot to shit.

Making room for friendship and love slows ya' down.

But, then again, what's the rush?

And just like that, the clarities gone again... so I'm going surfing.

Tomorrow, hopefully, we're getting the fuck out of TOURIST-FILLED TAMARINDO.

The real world is somewhere else.

I love y'all.

Yer Friend,

MAX